Do you sometimes feel demotivated or listless and unable to see the wood from the trees?
Do you sometimes wonder how to make it all meaningful, or how to survive the dark night of the soul?
Many high achievers put in tremendous effort to achieve goals and targets personally and professionally only to discover that the achievement is not meaningful and comes at huge expense. Consider that...
“The quality of our lives is determined by the quality of our inner state of being,
the quality of the emotional states in which we consistently live.
Destiny is the result of our actions and responses in any given situation.
So, it is then that in our moments of decision our destiny is shaped.”
All that I am is the result of what I have been through and what I have not yet thought.
You're probably quite familiar with a version of the following:
Thought manifests as emotion
Emotion manifests as moods
Mood manifests as temperament
Temperament manifests as impulse
Impulse manifests as action
Action manifests as habit
Habit manifests as destiny – life’s reality in health, relationships, finances etc.
IN MOMENTS OF DECISION, OUR EMOTIONAL STATE IS CRITICAL.
“Decisions taken in a state of conflict rarely lead to intelligent action”- Ananda Giri OWA Faculty
Many of our decisions are taken either in a passive habitual manner and lack focus or are taken in a moment of crisis and inner conflict. Most of us have experienced making decisions in an angry inner state and we know that those decisions generally haven’t led to right or wise action. When dealing with challenging circumstances, keep in mind that action follows thought like shadow follows the body.
Live in Conflict and you will Decide in Conflict
Act in Conflict and you will Live in Regret, Guilt or Anger which in turn leads to More Conflict.
First free yourself from conflict and then decide on right action. Don’t act in haste; allow time and space for intelligence to come into the decision.
4 Principles of Right Action
1. Action performed when you are free from conflict
2. Action that is performed with total attention
3. Right action arises from our vision
4. Right action is free from self-centricity; it takes into consideration the wellbeing of you and the other.
A decision only becomes a decision when we act on it. Too often real decisions that lead to action are taken when we are in a state of inner disturbance which propels us to deciding and acting just so that we can feel that we are doing something to address the external situation that we blame for our inner state of conflict. Our inner conflict comes from the meaning that we have give to the external circumstance. Unless we become aware of our inner state, conflict builds through or repetitive thinking and obsession to a point at which we feel compelled to act.
There is a better way – here is a simple OWA strategy for effectively dissolving conflict and moving to a calm and centered place when you become aware of disturbance, upset or conflict.
Become physically still
Take five deep breaths, inhaling through the nose, exhaling through the mouth
Focus on moving away from indulgence in the conflict and towards observation of the feelings you are experiencing and the thoughts the underlie the feeling.
What is the feeling that I am experiencing in this moment?
What thought is causing me to feel this way?
3 Incantations of these two questions
Is this hurt true?
Is this hurt real?
There is now a conscious choice –
Act on it from a calm and centred place with a focus on taking wise action; or
Of if you observe that the hurt is neither true nor real ask yourself “Do I want to allow this thought to take my life’s happiness?”